True friends...

Paint your toenails when they're ugly.

Dance with you in the parking lot when it's raining.

Throw away the scary potatoes when you won't touch them.

Switch dishes with you at expensive restaurants.
(Just to see if yours is yummier.)

Accompany you to the library...

...even when you're being silly.

Tell you when your decor skills are bad.

But best of all,

They make ridiculous faces when you hug them especially tight.